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July 23, 2013
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The supposedly serious DarK Knight Trilogy by devilkais The supposedly serious DarK Knight Trilogy by devilkais
Everybody has talked about the Nolan Trilogy , so I guess it's my turn ... and yes I am indeed searching for an excuse to accessorily give this picture a text. Anyhow, I love all of them ... Well okay , only 2 of them... 1 and a half ? Let's go case by case .


The reboot that everyone was waiting since Batman & Robin ( Also known as the movie that makes me laugh if only for the way Arnie says "the cure". Really stupid , but hilarious stuff would come out of it if it were a 20 minutes Warner Cartoon ... though you tell me who should play who . ). I have to admit, for a movie that wants to set its own take on the character , it does it well. We see Bruce as a kid. The murder of Bruce's parent We see why Bruce became Batman and how he trains etc....yaaawwn.... Okay screw it, the whole first act of Batman Begins is boring. The training in the mountains and becoming a member of the League Of Shadows is so tedious that I struggled to care.
I am asking for a Batman, not half an hour of Christian Bale training to be a ninja !
But he appears later as Batman ... and somehow has a rather unpractical voice for a Batman . I mean, isn't Batman supposed to be stealthy ? Seriously, Denethor had a more convincing diction !( Though the voice is not a complete failure , I 'd just give it to another hero and I know the right guy for that.). The rest is a rather standard Batman story , so been there , done that !
So I am not all that thrilled by this one. You know the story that you already heard a bajillion times and are not all that excited to hear about again (Arkham Asylum did it much better and in a much more gripping way !). The camera is shaky as hell and I never felt it gave the villains that much of a chance.
As for the good parts. Scarecrow was awesome ... BUT SO UNDERUSED DAMMIT (come on , not even a fight at the climax ? What a rip-off !). James Gordon was perfect (great job Gary Oldman ! You're one of the greats!) Liam Neeson is monotonous but still okay (Boy did I crave a hammier Ra's Al Ghul !) . Bale's Batman voice ONLY WORKS WHEN HE SPEAKS AT A LOW TONE, though as Bruce Wayne he did fine. And as for the dialogue ... it is pretentious and overblown but that is why I adore the damn speech XD , and hey, cheesiness does not mean you're wrong or can't get the point across .


And this is the one that is praised left and right ! A cinematic orgasm ! A movie so great that it brought prosperity and love on this planet for a millenia ! That 's how fans seem to describe it anyway ...
Okay fine , I' ll say it: It is the best of the 3. Easily the one I had the most fun with and that, despite its occasional preachiness , truly feels like a Batman movie !
The story ? Well a Looney Tunes character who forgot (or doesn't care ) about the way he got his scars decides to troll Gotham city , both honest citizens and mobsters. He will get his way through gasoline, dynamite, explosive , crossdressing , acid whisky and the exact joke he pulled in No Man's Land (No guy, this is not a new Joker ... a similar model existed way back !). Why is he doing this ? Because he wants to prove he's right ... AND because it is fucking funny !
MEANWHILE , Harvey Dent (also known as the reason your humble host watches this movie... Seriously , Two-Face does not get enough love here !) tackles the criminals as honestly as he can with Rachel Dawes glassy-eyed and competes with Bruce Wayne for her affections . Though since anyone who's heard of Harv knows that he's about as lucky as this , you all know how it turns out.

TRUE, the ending is contrived and seems to be here to justify a sequel but I forgive that due to how entertained I was. I mean come on , the only way this could be any better is if the Joker was sporting a T-shirt with a Trollface on it and making jokes about Batman's voice. (Though I think he pretty much laughed at it when Batboob started throwing him against the glass. The "WHERE ARE THEY ?", that is comedy gold !)
So the question isn't "Why So Serious ?" but "Was it really THAT serious?".


Finally , THE Closure ! Much better than the first one but .... not THAT disappointing to me. Seriously ? What did you expect from a guy that doesn't seem to accept he's making films about a billionaire detective in a batsuit ?!

So we have Bruce depressed for 8 years (And no beer gut? LIES ! That is pure fiction!),abandoning Gotham to whine about his misery and pain , but in a grandiloquent way so that we find complex therefore compelling. But he stays that way so much that you wish for him to be replaced by one of these Batmen 1) 2) 3) so that something ACTUALLY Happens ! (Select your number).
He also leaves his lifelong father figure Alfred over a woman he never even dated once... Huh ? Dude , this is Marion Cotillard ! She's gonna tell you she's Edith Piaf so many times your ears will bleed ! Run YOU FOOL !

And then BANE arrives ... giving me an actual reason to keep watching . True, I prefer Henry Silva's Bane voice and he does sound like Sean Connery here, but at least he's the only one having fun ! And I like my villains enthusiastic when then wreck stuff , yes sir ! (Am I the only one who thinks that him beating up the Bat would have been much better if there was a matador music to go with it ?)
He eloquently hammers Gotham into submission, a true FORCE of nature ! Until we discover he actually works for Talia ... Oh COME ON ! Why ? Was that really necessary ? Not to mention that Talia has the WORST death scene ever ! Shame on you writers , shame on you ! This is a bigger version of Begins ? Ah Phooey !

As for Catwoman.... boy was she unneeded ! The "romance" was forced since her ideology is about sthelf-preservation. In the comics there's a sense that she genuinely cares about him but that takes TIME and god knows how many stories ! Here? it is just that rushed.
Finally, the ending...

IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER IF HE ACTUALLY DIED ! I would have said : Damn ! That is what I call a cLOSURE ! But nope, Batman gets to live a happy life in Europe or whatever with Catwoman. I call RIP-OFF !

And isn't Gotham gonna be worse than ever now? With all the anarchy that happened ?
Ah screw it, I've read far worse Batman (That is praised for some ungodly reason ) so I can't be THAT harsh about it. It had fun moments despite the dumb ones , so I guess that is all I can say about it ...

And now for the rolling call of the entire trilogy !


- Wealthy Powerduck

- Nigel Powers

- A Civic Education Teacher

- Spooky Goopy

- William Somerset

- Officer Vlad Tepes

- Eric Roberts

- The Secretary

- Friz Freleng's Daffy

- Gemini Saga

- Une FATALE Erreur De Casting !

- Still a Better Robin than that goddamn Damian

- Steroids Kenny

- Spandex Blair

All my thanks to the great Eric Goldberg

prn1/p480x480/311240_361579713936057_607662001_n.jpg ! And Good night everybody !
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Ruyc Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2014
Good review, I guess you really hate Damian
devilkais Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2014
Oh trust me, when I HATE something, I never half-ass it nor do I do so without reasons.
DragoLord09 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2014
And here I thought I was the only sane one for not liking this movie trilogy!
devilkais Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2014
Well I do like 1 movie and a half from it XD . What is your favorite Batman movie ?
DragoLord09 Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2014
Personally, I feel more comfortable with animated than live-action superhero movies, the transition between the different styles is a little, jarring, for my tastes.
devilkais Featured By Owner Aug 11, 2014
Maybe this will be more to your liking .…
I mostly agree with you though I think there are some live action that worked beautifully: The Burton Batmans, Hellboy , the first 2 TMNT movies.
killb94 Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2014
Well, off to re-watch Tim Burton's films!
devilkais Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2014
Indeed , they do kick ass !
MyNameIsArchie Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Even though I think Nolan's second and third Batman films are great (the first one is meh), you make very valid points.
devilkais Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2013
Thanks again Archie ! 
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